I have been in therapy since the beginning of the year, and it has been a rewarding journey. Not everything is rosy, and I haven’t been spared any hurt and pain. However, what I find very comforting about therapy is how your perspective begins to shift from things that deeply hurt you to something that you can live with and, even sometimes, feel good about. In other words, it can help foster a growth mindset.
I started therapy because I was losing control over my anxiety. I wanted to feel good about myself. Slowly but certainly, that began happening once I started my therapeutic process. Once I improved, I began to cater my hobbies and private time towards maintaining and keeping that achievement with me.
One thing that came back to me during this process was the habit of reading. However, given that I am very focused on this journey, and I want to incentivize the healthy habits I am developing, I had a hard time finding new books that supported and motivated my journey. I did manage to find some interesting books, and I am very happy about this small selection. I am confident that if you are in a similar place in your life, these books will give you that hint of magic that we are always looking to keep in ourselves.
Finding Me: A Memoir by Viola Davis
The biography of a force of nature like Viola Davis must be fantastic. However, the common perception of Viola Davis doesn’t include the enormous resilience, bravery, and vulnerability, which she had to muster to tell her story. She does it with such an honest, warm, and genuine perspective that something shakes the reader’s core.
The discrepancy between the EGOT-status actress doesn’t seem compatible with the old, infested apartment where she used to hide from rats and other small animals. The actress takes you on her journey of self-discovery and how that broke her heart, disappointed her, and harmed her, but how she managed to grow and shine through all of it.
Sad stories are always very compelling. However, Viola’s story is beyond sad; it’s a celebration of her determination and self-reliance, which lead her to her professional, personal, and emotional successes. She isn’t afraid to show herself as vulnerable and broken, to the point that she admits struggling to accept certain parts of herself. It brings new layers of complexity to the actress to the point that it’s impossible to not ask yourself how you would manage in that situation? What challenges do you face that you don’t mention to others, but which make you feel ashamed of yourself? Viola serves as a great companion for those realizations and healing.
Making A Scene by Constance Wu
Before finding this book, I wasn’t very familiar with Constance’s work. I remember hearing some time ago about her controversy, which led her to step away from the public eye for some time. However, once I started reading the book, it felt like a very deep conversation with myself.
Constance is the daughter of immigrants to the United States. Hence, they had a set of expectations of her, for example, how they wanted her life to look like. But Constance found herself in the middle of this conflict, where she had to honour her own ethnicity, while growing up in the United States with those customs, languages, and culture. That sweet spot can be very isolating for many people, but Constance manages it as best she can with the tools she had at her disposal.
The book also delves into her relationship, her family, and her career, as well as the expectations you impose on yourself as society demands certain behaviours. Constance expresses her thoughts and ideas so eloquently that it makes you feel so close to her as if she were your partner, your sibling, your parent. She describes the situations that shaped her adulthood and how she made amends with said situations.
The memories of Constance are so down to earth that’s it very easy to forget we are talking about a Hollywood actress that starred in one of the biggest Asian films in 2018.
En La Oscuridad by Antonio Pampliega
Antonio Pampliega is a freelance journalist who specializes in covering conflict and war zones. Antonio’s work is extensive, making him one of the best war journalists today. But nothing could have prepared me for what I read and what I was going through while reading his book. It’s just heartbreaking on levels that are very hard to describe.
Antonio got kidnapped by a terrorist cell in Aleppo, where he was covering the civil conflict in 2015. I think we can all agree that being abducted by a terrorist organization in a foreign country in the middle of a war is the absolute worst-case scenario someone could face. But Antonio managed to survive it, and went on to give us all the details in his book. Antonio’s fascinating perspective finds a way to put you right there with him, the day it occurred, and the time he spends in captivity.
The journalist in him led him to answer all the typical questions: Where were you? How did it happen? Who do you think did this to you? Why did you go to Syria when it was strongly advised against? But Antonio makes a compelling description of the evolution of his mental state during the whole process – going through denial, resignation, and acceptance. Such an extraordinary situation gave Antonio the time and strength to go down the darker corners of his mind, not without delegating blame for this situation.
On the contrary, the guilt kept him company during this time in captivity. I have always wondered what I would do in the absolute worst situation. I think Antonio having the courage to tell his story gave me the knowledge I didn’t know I needed to feel confident in myself about confronting the challenges I can face. It gave me an incredible amount of perspective regarding the privilege of having a home, family, and friends. It made me acknowledge the privilege of living in a country where all liberties are commodities and are mostly taken for granted.
El Director by David Jimenez
The tales of El Director are fascinating and beyond complex. David Jimenez was a war correspondent until May 2012, when he became the director of the journal El Mundo in Spain. I always find it fascinating to see stories of people who, in ideal situations, couldn’t feel more out of place. It makes me wonder about their self-reliance and their sense of self and worth.
David, in a very intimate tale, gives you the details of the time he spent as the director of one of the most reputed journals in Europe. He also writes about the ignorance of the general public about the behind-the-scenes in the media world, as well as the arrogance and the power struggle that seemed to be extremely unfamiliar for David. Perhaps this was because he spent most of his professional life reporting in conflict zones.
It’s always healthy to live with a small degree of skepticism about your personality. Generally, it is a good idea to learn, experience, and embrace new things. And in David’s case, the struggle started from the first page. All of us imagine the perfect scenario and how we would do whatever it takes to reach a place where money is no longer a concern. That has become the goal and objective imprinted in us, but what about the cost? It’s not something you are willing to pay. For David, that was a clear realization.
Power is related to influence and money will always become tempting. In David’s stories, it’s remarkable how he struggles with himself and the cold realization that journalism is not about people; it’s about favours and preferences in high spheres of power. The inner conflict of David serves as a yellow road to follow in order to question yourself: Are you comfortable enough with yourself to defend your beliefs until the last minute? Or do you feel there is no cost you wouldn’t pay for the right opportunity?
Perhaps there is no right or wrong answer. David’s book is an easy read, and along the pages, you will find yourself questioning your morals and the capacity you think you have to defend your stand.
I’m Glad My Mom Died by Jennette McCurdy
There isn’t anyone right now that hasn’t heard about this book. Jennette Mccurdy of the beloved Sam from Icarly released her memoir in August 2022, and it took the world a storm, aside from the controversial tales and how she handled her “fame.” Jennette took the opportunity to be completely transparent and honest about the events that shaped her life and her persona until she admitted to being in a self-destructive spiral.
I found this title particularly fascinating for a simple fact: I could never think poorly of my mother; she is the closest person to me. But I came to a very hard and rough realization that only some of us have experienced. As a society, we discuss this too little, if you ask me. It’s easy to blame yourself for your problems, and in certain ways, taking ownership and responsibility for the events that take place in your life is necessary.
But what if your life is how it is because you have never experienced another type of life? What if you have completely normalized harmful behaviours and then need to go out in the world to find out from other experiences the harm that has been done to you? I cannot imagine a more difficult situation.
This realization led me to believe in the relevance of sharing experiences. I don’t mean that everyone needs to forget about their privacy and begin to be a fully open book, but we do need to find those spaces where we can be honest and learn about other experiences to be able to help ourselves. We often tend to feel ashamed of things we don’t understand about ourselves.