Under the Knife for Love

Love – where do you draw the line?

You know when you are loved. You feel the love with every fibre of your being. You feel special and accepted as you are. You express no worry about the person you love.

However, it is common for many women to either feel rejected or not properly loved. Some of the women I have known and seen in this era go above and beyond to impress a man, even if that means undergoing surgeries just to make themselves feel more desired. While it is possible to do a particular enhancement to pamper yourself, it is not ordinary to do so as a way of seeking acceptance by your significant other.

This is why you should only want a relationship with someone who genuinely loves you. Someone who wants you to be a part of their lives, a part of everything they do.

What is the motivation behind this surge in cosmetic surgeries?

If I get a smaller waist, which many lose a rib for, I will be so seductive to the extent where he will find me more attractive. If I continue to enhance my lips, he will eventually fall in love with me. If I lose weight, get other enhancements, or wear designer clothes, he will know I am the woman for him. 

To the lady with such feelings, I am here to tell you differently. It doesn’t work. Don’t go to them; don’t tire your body and overextend yourself for someone who is not halfway there. You can’t make him love you, no matter what physical attributes you enhance. Beauty can only go so far, and he will know you are trying too hard. He will know you are going above and beyond. Instead, try this:

Become carefree 

If you have long hair, wear it in a ponytail. Forget the eyelash extensions. Not everything is about vanity and appearance. Many men don’t care for that. 

Once, at a party, I saw a good-looking girl with lash extensions. After chatting with her for a while, she told me that her boyfriend hated her lashes because they reminded him of his mother. Comical. I had them done when they first came out while on vacation in Croatia and it took more than 2 hours to place one after another.  

In another instance, I stumbled upon a high school friend at the mall and didn’t recognize her at first. She looked different and nothing like before, as the surgeries had improved many parts of her body. I miss the lovely, jovial girl she once was and who is now hiding under all these procedures. It makes me wonder if she is truly happy at heart. I wonder when enough is enough.

As women, we are blessed with many tools that can help us enhance our beauty. However, some women simply go too far, risking their own health. To be great at any relationship, whether it is with a friend or a romantic partner, we always need the inside to shine. The change on the inside will give you an everlasting result for success in every relationship.

This change will enhance everything about you without a cost.

Start improving your thoughts about yourself

I am beautiful just the way I am, even if my nails are not painted. Do you know that in some religions, if women paint their nails, they can’t pray? This is why women who pray consistently and on a daily basis have natural nails. Does this mean they are less attractive? In my opinion, no. 

I don’t paint my nails when I have a month of prayer, and I think my nails are beautiful naturally. Some women choose to not shave or clean up their facial hair. Others I have spoken to say the reason they don’t use excessive enhancement is that they don’t want to interfere with their natural aging process. I welcome age and enjoy every decade as it comes. 

Stop the negative talk inside your head

You can change all the negative thoughts about yourself by reprogramming your mind to believe differently. Believe that you are who you are and that you are perfect the way you are. Unmasked. Yes, of course, you need to take care of yourself and engage in beauty. We have the privilege of using make-up but, simultaneously, we must avoid becoming overly obsessive about having the perfect look.

Love yourself and start building an outstanding self-esteem

You may be lacking self-love if you are constantly looking in the mirror, seeking reassurance and validation from others. In addition, doing many cosmetic procedures can leave you with many scars –physical scars and scars on the inside. Start your self-love journey by standing in front of a mirror every day for a month and saying:

I love you, ____ (say your name). It may be uncomfortable or silly at first but it truly works. You must also diminish the negative self-talk and only repeat positive affirmations so that your mind gets reprogrammed to positivity and self-confidence. Be intentional, start listening and be self-observant.

There are many great phrases you can say to yourself to win your own love and become carefree around others who live like you. Try it. And I hope you find your greatest love.

So, remember, no matter what type of relationship it is, you should only love people who really want you as you are. You are worth loving. Good luck!